Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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