i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
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