if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
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You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...