final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop