I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
