dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Who died my cat blue again?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
