I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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