Me. At least after what I've been through.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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