Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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