Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
