I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
