Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
