my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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