): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
