Who wears a wallet chain?!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Randomize
