New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
