Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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