Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
