Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
