she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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