The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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