She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
