The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
