Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how my cats smell like pot.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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