Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.