Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  You drinking a lot?

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  No.

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  Define a lot

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  (850): You drinking a lot? (1-850): No. (1-850): Define a lot http://tfl.nu/heqj
  Replies (15) Good night (3057) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'

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  (334): i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified' http://tfl.nu/dnlw
  Replies (51) Good night (2917) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion

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  (480): my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion http://tfl.nu/golc
  Replies (263) Good night (3665) Bad night (31658)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.

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  (314): I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window. http://tfl.nu/w8zt
  Replies (14) Good night (4503) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.

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  (770): I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon. http://tfl.nu/qalv
  Replies (14) Good night (922) Bad night (4381)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.

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  (847): Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free. http://tfl.nu/2six
  Replies (42) Good night (9964) Bad night (1767)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that

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  (289): i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that http://tfl.nu/oz0t
  Replies (5) Good night (835) Bad night (4502)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.

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  (562): I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex. http://tfl.nu/ik0l
  Replies (15) Good night (5724) Bad night (1162)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness

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  (484): 5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness http://tfl.nu/vhep
  Replies (6) Good night (1043) Bad night (3443)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.

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  (203): No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience. http://tfl.nu/6ty7
  Replies (11) Good night (1602) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night

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  (931): Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night http://tfl.nu/chyx
  Replies (8) Good night (764) Bad night (1421)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.

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  (443): Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude. http://tfl.nu/yo4l
  Replies (3) Good night (607) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment

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  (978): He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment http://tfl.nu/j7an
  Replies (3) Good night (334) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.

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  (740): Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls. http://tfl.nu/nbbw
  Replies (19) Good night (384) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol

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  (732): you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol http://tfl.nu/3eay
  Replies (2) Good night (595) Bad night (281)

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