she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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