dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
