finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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