Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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