whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
