my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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