I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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