so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
