He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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