It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
