4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
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I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
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Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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