ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize