I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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