I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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