You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize