So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize