Yo dont text me then not text me
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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