Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Randomize