38 yer olds are good kisserssss
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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