thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
