yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I am midnight drunk by noon
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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