if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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