There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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