Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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