I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
