had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
