Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
