Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
