so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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